Mandy's 18th Birthday!

Okay, I'm a bit late posting this, but at least I'm taking the time now to post. Seems like I have been incredibly busy these past few days. I am going to update about Christian probably tomorrow so I won't go into the details of him right now.

This post is dedicated to my little sister, Mandy Anne Bullington! She just turned 18 on  February 7th. All of my siblings are growing up so fast! This year  she is a senior in high school! She was just recently crowned homecoming queen at her school, and she was so beautiful! I wish I could have been there to see her being crowned! Here are some pictures from that night.

 On her birthday she found out she was accepted into Pensacola Christian College in Pensacola, Florida! I don't know what she is majoring in yet though. I am so excited for her and we will both live in the same state once again! :) I am very happy for her as she enters into this new chapter in her life!

Mandy is such a kind person and a great sister! When she was little she had beautiful blonde curls and she was the only one to be born with 2 crowns on her head. She loved to look pretty and would dress up constantly. She always had some sort of accessory on :) And she loved to carry papers around in her purses. She loved Precious Moments and had several of the dolls. She is named after Mama, both of their middle names are Anne.

Mandy, if you read this I want you to know I love you with all my heart! And I am here for you if you ever need me! I will always remember that time after Mama died when I found you on the porch and we cried and talked together. You know, we will never lose Mama completely, she is in all of us. I want you to know I am so proud to  have you as my sister and I love every moment we can spend together. I always look forward to seeing all of you so much! 

I'm sorry this post is late, I was going to do this on her birthday but  it never happened.  I am going to end this post here, but I will post more pictures below! Goodnight everyone! :)

Paige

Mandy at our cousin's wedding

Mandy riding her bike

Carla, Mandy and me (I'm holding Mandy)

Mandy and me reading :)

Mandy and me

Mandy and me

Mandy

Mandy & Maria Rose

My wonderful sisters!

Mandy decorating for Christmas

Mandy and Carla on Christmas

Mandy and Maria on Christmas

Happy 13th Birthday James!

Hello! I want to go ahead and post this while I can and before I forget. Christian is nursing right now on his way to dream land. :) I began to write this post a little earlier, but I had to put it on hold since Christian was wanting my full attention. So I gave him a bath, folded clothes while he played, and now I am holding while he sleeps. So maybe I can get this post done now. :)

Today is my brother's birthday! His name is James Greg and today he is 13 days old! I just can't believe he is 13 now! I remember so clearly when he was born and now he is a teenager. I'm sure that's exactly how I will feel with Christian. Well, I'm feeling that way now with him already being 6 months old.

I am the oldest of 6 children, and James Greg is the youngest. I considered myself his second mom growing up. :) I was eleven, almost twelve when he was born. Mama always called him her miracle baby since she almost lost him while pregnant. I love him so much and would call him my baby. I eventually had to stop though because it embarrassed him lol. But he will always be. He was seven when I moved away from home so I'm sure he doesn't have a ton of memories of me being there. It breaks my heart but our age difference makes it that way. I know now most of what he knows of me is what others tell him, and I hope they are telling him the truth. I don't want him growing hating me because they don't agree with how I live. I just live like a normal person, I don't smoke, drink, do drugs or anything like that. I just hope he doesn't think I am evil.

It has been awhile since I have talked to him since I don't have a phone that is long distance, but I really miss hearing his voice! Last time he talked to me on the phone he told me he missed me and that broke my heart. Being here in Florida is bittersweet. I love living here with my little family, but I also miss my family in Georgia, too. I don't get to see them much anymore so I always cherish anytime I see or talk to them. I don't think they understand how much I love them and miss them. But I do with all my heart!

James, if you ever read this I just want you to know I love you so much! More than I could ever express! You are my baby brother, and I am so proud of you. You have gone so far and done so well even with losing Mama at such a young age. That has always broken my heart and I have asked God why more times than I can count. We all still needed Mama, but especially you. You were her baby, she loved you so much! She babied you a little more knowing you were the last one. I know since you told me that you don't have many memories of Mama being healthy. And I'm sure as you get older, more memories will slip. I want you to know though that I am always here whenever you need someone to talk to. Between me and our siblings we will keep Mama's memories alive in you. If you ever want to talk about her or need help remembering, I am always here. I love you so much and I hope to talk to you soon!

James was always so cute growing up! He had nicknames for all of us, and I was 

Duh-Duh. :) Whenever you would ask him his name, he would reply ME! :) He called horses Emily, whenever he saw one he would yell Emilys! He had such a cute way of talking, and he always put up with Carla and me playing house with him. :) He has always had a tender heart, and I love that about him.

I need to go ahead and end this post so Cody can use this computer. I am going to add some pictures of James that I got from his facebook since I personally don't have any recent ones. Hope everyone has a wonderful evening! And a very happy birthday to James!!!

Paige

Videos of Christian!

Hi! :) As promised I am posting the videos that I took of Christian the other day! Sorry it's so dark in the videos, it always look more dark on the camera than it really is. Guess I just need to start turning on all the lights before I take a video of him. 

The first video just shows how cute and precious he is! :) He is such a happy and content baby and he loves to laugh and smile. If he gets around anyone new though he stares at that person, trying to figure them out haha. He is very observant! 

The other video is the new thing Christian does. He changes so often what his "new thing" is. He was loving his hands, but now it's all about his feet. He was trying to talk, saying a lot of vowel sounds, but then he got really quiet. Now his new thing is like a squeal. It's SOOO cute and I love hearing him do it. I have also learned to appreciate anything cute he does because it doesn't last long. Like I can't believe he is six months old already! And in six more months will be a year old! I don't even want to thing about that!

Well, he just woke up so now I back to typing with one hand lol. I will try and post another post later on today since today is my brother's birthday. See ya later! :)

Paige

Christian and my mama!

Hello! I think it's been three days since my last post. I can't post on here everyday, but I will try to when I can. :) I was wanting to post a couple of videos I took of Christian the night before, but this computer has issues lol. I need to upload the videos on the desktop, but it's occupied most of the time on the weekends so I will wait until tomorrow to do that. I only got to get on the laptop for like ten minutes yesterday lol. Most of the time I just use my Ipod touch to access the Internet, and it would be extremely difficult to post from it since it's out of date. Anyway,  I just plugged in the laptop to post something on here, but I didn't really know what to post about since I really had no pictures from today or from the weekend. But my mom has been on my mind a lot this weekend so I decided to post about her! :)

My mama would have LOVED Christian!!! She absolutely loved all babies, but of course loved her babies more! :) I so, so, so wish she could see Christian. I have a feeling she can see him from Heaven, I just believe she can see us. But of course I would love for her to be here to see him in person! I knew one day I would have children, and that I would be upset she isn't here to see them. But until having Christian I really didn't know how strongly that feeling was going to be. I don't get upset hardly anymore, but there is just a strong ache deep down inside. I don't think it will ever go away unless something happened to my brain and I couldn't remember anymore. To know Christian will never personally know her, tears my heart into two pieces. I will always tell him about her so he can know how wonderful she was and how she would love him. It just hurts to know he can never know her like I did. That hurts more than anything! I miss her so much for myself, but now it hurts more for Christian than for me. If that makes any sense...

I just know for sure, without a doubt, my mama would have fallen in love with Christian. I know she would be here whenever she could to spend time with him, her little grandson. She would spoil him, love him, be all the things a grandma would be. Although I know she wouldn't be called grandma. She always like Mimi since her name is Miriam. And I know Christian would have loved her, too. Everyone loved my mama, it was just impossible not to. :) 

I know she can never be here again until I see her in Heaven one day, but sometimes the hurt is too great and all I can do is to just wish she was here. It's hard to explain, but sometimes I try to will her here. I know you probably think  I'm weird now, but it's hard to explain. I guess it's just like trying so hard to make it all a bad dream, that nothing happened and everything is fine. Like she never died, but that can never be again. And I know that and accept that. Just sometimes, it hurts really, really bad and nothing can help that. I just hope I can convey to Christian how wonderful she was and that he will love her, too!

Well, Christian is getting fussy now. He is sitting beside me on the couch and I keep handing him things to play with, but he is running out of patience now so I need to feed him. I just wanted to post something really quick while I had a few minutes! I hope all of you are doing great and I will see ya in the next post. :)

Paige

 My Mama (Miriam) pregnant with me

Me pregnant with Christian

Mama after having me in the hospital

Me after having Christian in the hospital

Mama and me!

Me and Christian!